All that you have is your soul (Tracy Chapman).

Tuesday, 14 February 2006

The VP


Please let me introduce myself. I am Vice-President (VP) of the United States. That means that I am potentially the most powerful person in the world (in case my boss decides to either choke on a pretzel or break his neck after falling off a scooter). I have a serious heart condition and instead of taking it easy, I like to spend my time shooting birds.

I have been invited to a friend’s house. He just happens to be a millionaire who supports the Party which has placed me where I am today.

So, what do I do?

I know, I’ll go shooting. Even better, I’ll shoot the millionaire in the face with a bird pellet and then claim that I was mistaking him for a quail.

Oh, I almost forgot.

I’ll then go and hush it up for twenty four hours so that the world’s press might give me a little breathing space.

For those of you who are worried about Bin Laden sending off some more terrorists or Iran blowing the world to smithereens… you can relax, because with all things being considered, I am more of a liability to world peace than anyone else on the planet.

My only hope is that my boss is slightly less of a shmuck than I am.

1 comment:

As always... Rachael said...

No such luck my friend - bush is the supreme reigning schmuck of the earth.

I think Cheney kept it under wraps becuase he was drunk... that's my suspicion.

I don't care though. I want him to go down for his crimes against humanity... not for getting wasted and forgetting the safety was turned off.

Even the right wing NRA guys preach gun safefy... Cheney has shamed his constituents!

If the gun shot doens't get him... the heart attack might. It makes me wonder why the republicans want this guy dead?

HaHa - comspiracy theories are gonna fly!