All that you have is your soul (Tracy Chapman).

Monday, 28 September 2009

Post Yom-Kippur Optimism

Hi there friends. Yet again, I find myself having to apologise to the faithful who visit this site expecting to see my rantings. I have posted some blogs here recently, but not one of them would do any justice in trying to explain where my mind is at the present moment.

Or the rest of my body for that matter.

Thank you for still visiting, on the off chance that you might catch the latest episode in the soap opera that my life seems to have inexplicably morphed into over the last few months.

I can't go into precise details here, but to be blatently honest, I've seen better times. No, I'm not sick. No, I'm not out of work - in fact, that seems to be the one bit of timber that has survived from the shipwreck you see before you, something that I can hold onto when the tidal wave of life finally attempts to sink my remains to the bottom of the ocean. Suffice to say that one day, all (or at least some) will be revealed.

Which brings me to Yom Kippur. A day that evokes a torrent of thoughts and emotions, hopes and aspirations, fears and confusion. Quite a heady brew for one as young as me.

I thought about this post quite a bit yesterday as I was trying to re-assemble the Sukkah I put away last year. Again, I can't go into why these thoughts came into my mind, but I realised that being the optimist I am, helps me cope with almost any challenge that life decides to land me with.

Others in my position might fall apart, but something, something quite inexplicable within my psyche tells me that everything is going to be alright. I don't know how or why or for that matter, what - but this innate optimism, probably as foolish and naive as it puports to be - keeps me afloat at times when the water should justly be reaching over my eyebrows, envelopping me into a whirlwind of dispair, the kind that I really wouldn't want to wish on others.

At forty-one years of age, I realised yesterday afternoon, standing by the shed door, that were it not for my optimism, right now, I don't know how I would cope with my life. I know that the good Lord above will help me out. He hasn't let me down yet and I'm not about to turn my back on Him.

Optimism mixed in with a little dose of faith can take you a long, long way towards the brighter colours of the rainbow.

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